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“Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement.” (Golda Meir)

“You'll never find a better sparring partner than adversity.” (Golda Meir) 

 Scene of GOLDA movie. Left image: Rabbi Macia Tilchin

Golda Meir was known for her poignant, pithy wisdom and subtle humor. Over the course of her life, she aggregated a body of memorable teachings and quips that compel us to think, feel and often smile. Another often quoted saying of Golda’s is: “One cannot and must not try to erase the past merely because it does not fit the present.” This certainly speaks to how we embrace our ancient, foundational bodies of scripture and rabbinic wisdom.    

This week’s Torah portion, Parashat Ki Teitzei, in the middle of the Book of D’varim, will be read this coming Shabbat,  in synagogues on Saturday, August 26.  It is an assemblage of 74 diverse, seemingly archaic laws that cover a range of matters including divorce, collecting debts, dealing with captives of war, capital punishment and other “light topics.”  Laws concerning women are prominent in this parashah, including the proper treatment of captive women, physical abuse and assault, divorce and accusations of promiscuity. It begins with this mandate: 

“When you take (Ki teitze) the field against your enemies, and the Lord your God delivers them into your power and you take some of them captive, and you see among the captives a beautiful woman and you desire her and would take her to wife, you shall bring her into your house, and she shall trim her hair, pare her nails, and discard her captive’s garb.  She shall spend a month’s time in your house lamenting her father and mother; after that you may come to her and possess her, and she shall be your wife.  Then, should you no longer want her, you must release her outright. You must not sell her for money: since you had your will of her, you must not enslave her.” (Deuteronomy 21:10-14) 

These verses and several other laws in Ki Teitzei reflect the status of women as possessions or objects of desire, and reveal that women had no personal agency in the Ancient Near East. This was the way of the world for thousands of years and, in many places today, is still the norm. I would have much appreciated studying this collection of laws with Prime Minister Meir. Here are some questions we might have asked in our havrutah (study partnership): What about all those women among the captives who were not “beautiful”?  Where did they live if their fathers or husbands were killed in war?  Could they marry whoever they wanted or not marry at all and still have shelter and food?  The Torah leaves these questions hanging in the balance, but the course of Jewish history helps to fill in some gaps.  Of one thing we can be certain: Strong, capable women have always been integral to Jewish survival. 

Golda Mabovitch was born in 1898 at a time and place when every Jew, regardless of age or gender, had to pitch in to help each family survive. She spent more than 3 years without her father who had gone to the states to get work and save enough money to bring her family to America. During that time, Golda’s mother, Blume, cared for her three young daughters on her own . The family arrived in Milwaukee, Wisconsin via Quebec in 1906. Blume ran a grocery store and often left 8-year-old Golda in charge of watching the store when she was out buying supplies. Golda worked throughout her life and was a born community organizer. According to her biography, at the age of 14 her mother was pushing her to leave school (where she was excelling in her studies) and get married. Golda would not hear of it and opted to travel to Denver to live with her older sister Sheyna and her husband. There she continued High School and was introduced to the wonders of intellectual debate on key issues of the day like women’s suffrage, trade unionism and Zionism. She met her future husband, Morris Meyerson, in Denver. 

The immigrant generation that birthed Israel’s 4th Prime Minister could not afford to treat women solely as possessions – everyone had to pull their weight to survive, both in Eastern Europe and as immigrants. Yet Golda’s capable and diligent mother still felt that, in order for her daughter to be secure, she would need to marry at a young age.  For women, it was a time of change and double standard.  Israel’s first and only female Prime Minister understood that her gender was certainly noticed by others, even if she did not feel it was a distinguishing aspect of her leadership.   

Golda may well have understood the opening law in Ki Teitzei.  She had feelings about her looks, noted for also having said: “Not being beautiful was the true blessing.  Not being beautiful forced me to develop my inner resources. The pretty girl has a handicap to overcome.”  What could have compelled Golda to make this statement?  She must have known many “pretty” girls in her community that did not have the opportunities she forged for herself in her teens. Like Rebbe Meir’s wife, Bruriah – a recognized scholar in her own right – or Rashi’s three daughters who were taught by their incomparable father, Golda was an exception to the female norm of her time.  She would have excelled in whatever professional path she pursued, but perhaps perceived beauty might have been a hurdle to being taken seriously as a visionary leader.  What might this insight teach us about the women taken captive in war in biblical times? 

Ultimately Golda returned to her parent’s home, graduated High School in Milwaukee in 1915, became active in the Labor Zionist Movement, started attending college in 1916 and married in 1917 (at the age of 19) with the intention of settling in Palestine. World War I altered the young couple’s plans to make aliyah, so Golda devoted the next four years of her life traveling around the USA fundraising for Poale-Tzion, the Labor Zionist youth movement that later became known as Habonim.  She and Morris ultimately moved to Palestine in 1921 and were followed by her sister Sheyna and their parents. 

Golda’s aphorisms cover myriad topics including self-fulfillment, integrity, aging and war. Ki Teitzei ends with Moses’ adjuration to the Children of Israel to erase the memory of Amalek - the tribe associated with the first recorded instance of baseless Israelite hatred. “… Undeterred by fear of God, [Amalek] surprised you on the march, when you were famished and weary, and cut down all the stragglers in your rear. Therefore, when the Lord your God grants you safety from all your enemies around you, in the land that the Lord your God is giving you as a hereditary portion, you shall blot out the memory of Amalek from under heaven.” (Deuteronomy 25:18-19) 

To this, the wishful Golda might say that nothing would have pleased her more than for future generations to know nothing of the Amalek’s all over the world because antisemitism was eradicated. But her realistic persona would then add, “It is true we have won all our wars, but we have paid for them.” Golda understood that forced confrontations with enemies inevitably bring out the worst in ourselves. One of her well-known teachings about war is this: “We can forgive them (the Arabs) for killing our children. We cannot forgive them for forcing us to kill their children. We will only have peace with them when they love their children more than they hate us…”.   

Each of us is born with Torah to teach, contained within all we do and say over the course of our lives. The sum of Golda Meir’s courageous life as she stood shoulder to shoulder with the passionate women and men who built the modern State of Israel through sweat, grit and ingenuity has been left to us as a gift.  T'hi Zikhrah Barukh - May her memory endure as a blessing for all who learn about her extraordinary life and legacy.
Shabbat Shalom. 

Rabbi Hazzan Marcia Tilchin is the founder and spiritual leader of the Jewish Collaborative of Orange County, a non-profit dedicated to innovating and supporting local and national programming that enriches the landscape of Jewish life by encouraging individuals and families to connect their passions and purpose with Judaism. Rabbi Tilchin is a graduate of both the Jewish Theological Seminary of America and the Ziegler School of Rabbinic Studies.